Politics of Beauty
My daughter is beginning to listen to current events a bit. She asked me what I thought of Sarah Palin. "She is a woman," she explained. As much as I want to be about female empowerment, I had to say, "Well, she doesn't show good judgement." My daughter paused, then replied, "Yeah, but she's pretty." Despite the marching and fist waving, it stills seems to come to that. I shot back, "So, what? That doesn't matter!" The conversation ended and I wasn't sure if anything had been gained. As much as I preach to my children looks don't matter, the world surely tells them differently. Politics, popularity and dating still seem to be very much about the outside. Ask Hiliary Clinton about her private feelings regarding her campaign. Even if one excluded her policies, her physical attractiveness was a part of public perception problems.
I related the Palin discussion to my husband thinking he might shake his head. Laughing, he asked me if I "was still bitter from being a teenager?" No, he wasn't being a jerk. We know one another's soft spots. This is not one of them. Yes, I was the one at dances who fled to bathrooms during the slow songs. I clearly did not date much then. I just want more for my children. I thought on the braces, glasses, awkwardness and thought okay maybe I am bitter. Not for me....but for those who still have to encounter the truth. The truth is girls still worry about weight, clothing, appearance and acceptance. Yes, men do too. Yes, it eases with time. But, the salient fact is this: our sex, in current western culture, still seems to be held back by the unsubstantial facts of our physical features. The glass ceiling is lower, yet we still struggle with the preoccupations of color, size and shoe height. I guess I'll have a good laugh with my daughter when she experiences these awkward future times. Yet, I want to begin my own personal parade of demanding more.
I related the Palin discussion to my husband thinking he might shake his head. Laughing, he asked me if I "was still bitter from being a teenager?" No, he wasn't being a jerk. We know one another's soft spots. This is not one of them. Yes, I was the one at dances who fled to bathrooms during the slow songs. I clearly did not date much then. I just want more for my children. I thought on the braces, glasses, awkwardness and thought okay maybe I am bitter. Not for me....but for those who still have to encounter the truth. The truth is girls still worry about weight, clothing, appearance and acceptance. Yes, men do too. Yes, it eases with time. But, the salient fact is this: our sex, in current western culture, still seems to be held back by the unsubstantial facts of our physical features. The glass ceiling is lower, yet we still struggle with the preoccupations of color, size and shoe height. I guess I'll have a good laugh with my daughter when she experiences these awkward future times. Yet, I want to begin my own personal parade of demanding more.
Comments
The movie that got all the buzz at Sundance is about this very thing. It is called "Miss Represented". I cannot wait to see it, what appeals to me is part of the film involves interviews of very sucessful (but ordinary looking) women on how they personally rose above these standards for women. Their advice would be good for all of us.
For example...I put my picture on my substitute cards so that teachers could see that I was not too young, not too old, and that I have nice teeth. Yup, it's worked.
Now the picture if from the neck up, cause if they saw any more of me, they'd see the muffin top that just doesn't stop...
Gonna have to work on that one day.