Running Red Momma

Years ago, my husband and I tentatively dipped our feet into parenting. At the time, we expressed our enjoyment of older kids and teens. We thought we would endure those "painful" newborn years. Four babies later, I was chatting with my husband on the phone while I folded newborn clothes to be shipped off to a younger sister. Without forethought or warning, I was surprised by my tears. It seemed as if my body were telling me not to skip lightly over the joy I have had with my newborns. Despite what I may vocally express or feel, my inner spirit has celebrated the creative event of having children. Yet, my human self has a hard time always being patient with the nature of living. Less than a year ago, I called my husband as I tried to wash dishes with my very pregnant belly. I was tired, frustrated and feeling useless. So, I did what any irrational pregnant woman would do. I yelled at my him. I demanded an "end-date". I wanted to know when this life of chor

My little love bug was up all hours last night and my butt was dragging today. I had NO desire to do anything responsible. But, I had to get my house/life/act together. I really was only able to start working when the music was loud. More than once, I have heard an older person say loud music is offensive or wrong. That is a complaint for this mortal plane. Well, what happens in heaven? I'm pretty sure those mansions don't clean themselves. I was wondering if they let the late night cleaning crew listen to their own music. I don't think I can mop to Bach's Sonata in G. I am figuring that if I am going to get anything done in the next life, there must be tunes! If I am going to really dwell on this, I don't want to eat fish and honeycomb in the next life either. Is there a place for folks like us? Maybe I will be the gardner for the other folks. If your butt is dragging and you aren't worried about the next life consequences, my list of energy maki

I am sitting on hold trying to sort out the typical health insurance problems. As I look at the dishes and my paper strewn desk, it seems my life is a continuous push/pull state. Sometimes, I don't yell at my kids and the house is messy. My house is clean, but I haven't exercised. I find time for a cardio workout, but I'm too tired to floss my teeth. Is that gross? I finally get around to putting on my cremes to stop those little wrinkles from appearing and then I realize I haven't had any decent conversation with my husband that night. I play with my kids and forget to make dinner. My mind is enlarged by reading a great book and I ignore my children that day. The list continues until I question the pattern of it all. Is this the purpose of life to achieve and fall in seamless motion? If everything did happen perfectly in one day, would I walk around like some Stepford standout? Would I feel happy if it all did happen "just so"? Sadly, I have the misp